It’s too cold, and it’s not fun anymore.
Cold was fun when I got to make homemade soups, and peruse Brooklyn Flea with a $4 coffee in hand, and play in the snow (I never played in any snow). But now I’m tired of eating soup, I would rather die than go to Brooklyn Flea, and I can’t even play in the snow! All I want to do is sit at home and watch Hulu. But I watched all the Hulu. I’m listening to The Moth Radio Hour these days. I’ve resorted to the oral tradition. Seriously. Like it’s olden times.
I can’t even snack decently. It’s become gratuitous, just pounding my face with chocolate chips and potatoes of all varieties. It’s not enjoyable. But I’m too lazy to go outside and explore better foods. So I just crunch and crunch until I fall asleep to some Hulu Original, because that’s what it has come to.
Doing things is out of the question. Just writing this blog post (one of my laziest, I must admit) has taken a lot out of me. I’m going to have to watch three episodes of Girls afterwards, just to make up for it.
Maybe winter has gone on too long? I think someone needs to check when this thing normally ends. Today weather.com said that winter keeps going for a while like this, just cold and rain, cold and rain, chance of snow showers, cold. At least for the next 10 days. That seems excessive. The groundhog said spring was a’comin’. You’re not a liar, are you groundhog?
When it’s not winter anymore, I won’t have to wear my fuzzy-on-the-inside hat that makes me turn from left to right every few seconds, because it always feels like someone is creeping up on me. It just your hat, Lauren. It’s just your hat.
When it’s not winter anymore, I will eat a veggie wrap for lunch, and drink iced coffee for a pick-me-up. People will invite me to do things, and I might want to do them.
When it’s not winter anymore, I will go out without a coat, and hat, and scarf, and mittens, and sack of miscellaneous weather-proof items, and I won’t lose any of these things, because I will be wearing a romper. It’s all one piece.
And I know with all my heart, that one day it won’t be winter. Because nothing cold can stay. (If I wasn’t so lazy-bones, I’d do a full eight-line play on Robert Frost’s “Nothing Cold Can Stay,” but we’re all lucky I was even able to stay awake long enough to write this, and half of you don’t even know what I’m talking about, so…)